This week I started an eight week course on praying with the scriptures, based on the spiritual exercises of St. Ignatius. A couple people have mentioned these exercises to me in the past, especially when I spoke of my daily scripture readings. Since I wasn’t familiar with St. Ignatius, I had planned to look into the spiritual exercises anyway. Before I got a chance to do so, I saw this program listed in our parish bulletin, so I decided to see firsthand what it’s all about.
I asked my friend Diane if she’d like to join me, and she happily accepted my invitation. I met my fellow alto and a soon-to-be retiree through our church choir, and I’ve gotten to know her a little better since she joined the St. Vincent de Paul Society. We’ve had few discussions about spirituality, so my hunch that she’d be interested in this exploration of prayer was right on target.
On Tuesday evening we set off for the historic Boston-Edison district in Detroit, where the program was being offered at Catholic convent. Neither of us had been to the district before, and we were awed at the spectacular mansions built in the early 20th century. The spires of the Blessed Sacrament Cathedral were especially dramatic against the heavily clouded dusk sky.
The majestic convent, with its extensive wood trim, brick floors, and even a stained glass window, added to the atmosphere of peace and reverence. So did our facilitator, with his soothing accent (Caribbean, I think) and warm smile. He gave us a little background on St. Ignatius, and showed the first in a series of videos developed by the late Jesuit priest, Anthony de Mello.
The topic of this week’s video was how to find God through silence. I found de Mello’s words both puzzling and profound. He offered three steps for seeking God through silence: Understanding, Look/Listen/See/Hear, and Scriptures.
Understanding in this context means the realization that we cannot have an understanding of God, because he is beyond anything we can imagine. What a paradox! I guess I can understand that God cannot be explained or described, but I’m not sure how realizing this concept will help me to know God. Perhaps it will become clearer in the silence of my meditation.
The priest next spoke about Heart Looking and Heart Listening. His directives: “See God in all things. Look as if you are seeing for the first time. Listen all sounds, but avoid putting names to them. Listen as if you are hearing for the first time”. In the video, Father told story upon story of our human longing to know God, of how we miss the things that are right in front of us, of how words fail to satisfy our thirst for spirituality. Since Father de Mello was born in India, he has a very lyrical pattern of speech. I was entranced with his tales as well as his Eastern way of thinking.
Finally, Father gave this formula for praying with scriptures: Read, Recite, React. I was surprised that he suggested the recitation of a favorite scripture passage as a mantra, but I tried it and found it very effective. The images that developed during my meditation were certainly powerful.
I chose Romans 8:14 – 27 from among the recommended readings for my first week’s meditation. The sentence I focused on was “Likewise, the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with sighs too deep for words.” As the exercise for silence suggests, I imagined Christ standing before me reciting these words (I changed the words “we” and “us” to “you”, so Jesus was addressing this statement directly to me). At first I repeated the sentence over and over, letting the words roll over me and resound in my heart. Eventually, just the phrase “sighs too deep for words” was repeated. I imagined the Holy Spirit breathing deep sighs into my soul, which kindled a small glowing fire. With each sigh, the flame grew bigger, until I imagined my heart burning with love and praise for God.
After the recitation, I reacted to my experience with many questions: What does it mean for my heart to glow with love for God? Was my sense of communion with the Lord the result of the Holy Spirit’s sighs upon my soul? Is this then how I ought to pray? Even though my first meditation ended with questions, it also brought me much joy and excitement about learning to pray in a new way.
While I was writing this blog I thought I’d get a little more information on Anthony de Mello. My Google search led me to some of his lectures on YouTube, and I decided to listen to the one titled “Wake Up! Pray” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vmTSdxxnTw). This video was an excellent follow up to the one I saw at the Praying with Scriptures seminar. I was especially entranced with another Father de Mello story. This one revolved around the inventor of fire, and the reverence his followers developed after he had been poisoned by the jealous elders. According to the fable, the followers built an altar to the inventor, adorned with his portrait and the tools for making fire. They worshiped at the altar for decades and even centuries, developing rites and liturgies to venerate the great man. But amazingly, during all of their rituals, there was never any fire. Father concluded his story with the cry, “Want to know prayer is? Fire!” Whatever it is that brings you fire, that is prayer.”
And so it is.
Friday, February 13, 2009
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